A Dog's Life Remembered

We lost our beloved golden retriever Lucky last night to terminal cancer after a month-long battle in which he still kept his spirit. He touched our lives and those of many people over the years with his good and loving nature.

In the 10 years we shared with him, we enjoyed his company in a hotel in Manhattan, on the beach in Miami, going cross-country in the car, in the wildness of the Arizona mountains and even on his first flight in a plane this year, back to New York. His companionship was constant and heartfelt, and his facial expressions, as many people have said over the years, were quite human.

I've had a minister and others tell me that only humans go to heaven, but knowing how much Lucky loved others makes me rather inclined to think that good dogs do go to heaven, too. Why would we lack the animal companionship we cherish on earth in a place that is meant to be the ultimate realization of our souls? It would be a less playful, joyful place without dogs in it.

It seemed that Lucky, who always loved Christmas, held on so that he could share it with us. The night before J.D. went back to New York, he became violently ill and was unable to walk. We hoped, that like other times, he might regain his strength in the morning, but it was not to be. After a day of lying immobile, we took him to the vet to see if there was anything that could be done. We learned he had massive internal bleeding, and would not recover. His kidneys had shut down and he was in pain.

His vet, Dr. Tammy Pouletto, broke the news gently and gave us a room to stay in where we sat with him and had time to talk with him and pet him to prepare him and ourselves for his death. Lucky, who has always seemed preternaturally intelligent, was graceful to the end, lying quietly and waiting for the injection. The catheter in his leg was wrapped in a bandage that had a heart on it.

Although the house seems empty and we are grieving now, we know that Lucky is in a better place. We hope that we will be able to see him again some day in the sweet by-and-by.

The Christmas Gift of Love

With the reminder that Christ's birth was the Word made flesh -- and Grace and Truth made reality -- the church service was the beginning of a day that was as close to ideal as it could be. We celebrated Christmas this year with an unexpected joy in the beauty of the day and the comfort of family gathered around.

I say that it was unexpected because the weeks following Thanksgiving have been challenging, to say the least. Health issues ranging from flu and cold to more serious complications for Andy and then our dog's collapse have all made it a stressful time.

The weekend after Thanksgiving our beloved golden retriever Lucky was so weak he was unable to walk, then spent the night whimpering. Within a few days, after tests, we discovered that he had cancer in his heart and spleen. We took him to a specialist veterinary center in Gilbert, where a cardiologist and oncologist did tests that confirmed the diagnosis. Since then, we've been to a holistic vet, the wonderful Dr. Metcalf, who has revived Lucky to a great degree with Chinese herbs, acupuncture and adjustments to a spine that is pained possibly by the strain to his system. He's also on a special diet, a medicine to ease his pain when he is suffering and a steroid drug to maintain his appetite.

Yes, he is a dog, but he is Andy's loyal companion of 10 years, who has been by his side through his chronic pain. Now Andy is giving him the kind of devotion in care that you would expect toward a child. The only difficulty is that his is like a very large child in an 80-plus pound body. On at least three occasions, Andy has had to carry him back into the house after a walk. We also have to help him into the car and lift him onto the bed, where he sleeps every night. His discomfort has caused him to wake on many occasions, and that has meant many nights of interrupted sleep for us all.

The pain medications have stabilized his sleep somewhat, so now we are getting into a routine. When his "boy," J.D., our son, came for Christmas from New York, he seemed to perk up even more. Lucky has always loved Christmas, and enjoyed having the Christmas tree in the house. When J.D. and I got the tree and decorated it, he laid on the floor next to us. Then when we put on Santa hats, he snatched J.D.'s off of his head and ran off with it, like he once did when he was a puppy. We all laughed as we watched him wag his tail and wait for us to chase him. Although he was more animated then, it tired him out and he was weak the rest of the evening.

At church this morning, it was heartening to see all of the volunteers preparing for the "Don't Spend Christmas Alone," dinner the church holds each year. We were leaving after the service as meals were taken away by the fire department for shut-ins and buses were arriving filled with people who were coming for the dinner. Several hundred people partake in the meal each year.

Back at home, we opened presents, and although he was a bit unsteady, Lucky pulled the wrapping off of several boxes as he usually does at Christmas, before lying down on the floor next to us to watch us finish opening them ourselves. He relished his one Christmas treat that's not on his approved diet -- a gourmet dog peanut butter treat. We all basked in the warmth of the day, admiring our new gifts, talking about Christmases past and walking in the neighborhood on a perfectly sunny day.

Later, I made a dinner as J.D. watched "Night at the Museum" on TV, a fire burned in the fireplace, and Andy sat in his easy chair, Lucky lying nearby. Over dinner, we said a prayer of thanks, remembering that each day is a gift, and that we're grateful most of all for the days when love makes everything seem all right, and even bearable when things are not.